The Importance of Pleasure + 3 Pleasure Rituals

We are spiritual beings, but here as humans, we have bodies. Our bodies experience a wide range of sensations and emotions — fear, anxiety, shame, joy, love, pleasure, and many more.

Pleasure is one of the things that feels so specific to having a body - something that’s available to us through the tactile, through sensation, through what we can see and feel and touch.

One of my favorite quotes about pleasure comes from the classic The Ethical Slut: “pleasure is a worthwhile goal in and of itself.”

Many of us have learned in our society that prioritizing pleasure is selfish, unnecessary, and even wrong. But pleasure is our birthright, and as the quote above shares — it is worth pursuing. We all deserve to experience pleasure. 

In this blog, I’m sharing three rituals to help you tap into pleasure. Scroll down to read them!

Before we jump into the rituals, here's a list of ritual items that correspond to pleasure. Any of these items can be used to help you set the intention to invite in more pleasure. They are in no way necessary, but if you have them on hand, feel free to add them to any of the following rituals.

Pleasure Correspondences:

Crystals- rose quartz, garnet, carnelian, ruby

Element- Water

Colors- pink, red, orange

Tarot cards- The Empress, Queen of Cups, The Sun

Plants and scents- Rose, sandalwood, ylang ylang, patchouli, cinnamon

Shell- CowryEnergy points- Sacral

1. Presence Ritual

To me, one of the key ingredients to pleasure is presence. Many of us aren’t present throughout our days for many deeply valid reasons, from trauma to busyness, but when we aren’t present with our lives, I believe we miss out on a lot of the pleasure available to us in the moment.

For this presence ritual, all you’ll need to do is bring presence to something you’re doing in your day. Here are some examples of things you could try doing more mindfully to experience the pleasure within them:

• Taking a walk

• Eating a snack or a meal 

• Gardening

• Watching the sunset

• Having a conversation with someone you love 

• Listening to a song you love 

• Listening to a poem over audio 

• Moving your body in some way (yoga, dancing, running, etc.)

• Having sex (solo or with others) 

Whatever you choose, try to ground yourself beforehand with a few breaths, a hand on your body, petting your animal companion, or doing something else that feels grounding for you. 

Throughout the experience, try to keep your breath deep and truly notice your embodied experience. When you feel yourself drifting back into your mind (I can almost guarantee this will happen, and that’s okay!), try to just notice that, release the thoughts, and return to your breath. Just keep showing up with your breath and your presence, and see how it helps you attune to the pleasure that’s available to you at this moment. 

2. Exploring the Senses Pleasure Ritual

This ritual is inspired by a group experience I took part in at Spirit Weavers a few years ago called Pleasure Stacking.

For this ritual, you’ll want to gather items that can stimulate the senses (sight, sound, taste, smell, and touch). Get creative and use what you have around you! What items in your space open up possibilities for you, feel delicious, or spark curiosity? 

Here are some things that I have used for this ritual to inspire you: 

• Crystals with different textures 

• Silky fabrics 

• Eye mask 

• A delicious tincture that tastes like cacao  

• Fruit  

• A CBD pre-roll  

• Velvety fabrics 

• Scented massage oil  

• Incense  

• Candles 

• A chain from a necklace  

• Sensual music  

1. Once you select the items you'll be working with for this ritual, set yourself up somewhere you feel comfortable - I like to lay down on a yoga mat on the floor.

2. Light your candles and incense if you’re using them, and start to breathe deeply and tune into the senses.

3. The intention of this ritual is to connect with pleasure through the senses and through the body. The only guideline is to use your tools intuitively and keep breathing!

4. Try to really stay present with sensation. You might start by rubbing oil on your body and massaging yourself, experimenting with different pressures. You might trace the chain from your necklace over your belly, taste your tincture or fruit, let your music wash over you and find organic movement, breathe in the scent of your incense, or wrap yourself in different fabrics.

5. As you work with this ritual, notice what happens in your body. Notice what feels delicious in your body, what just feels weird, what your body wants more of. Can you give yourself what you need?

6. As you keep tuning into the senses, allow any organic pleasure mantras to arise like “I deserve pleasure,” “My pleasure is sacred,” or “My pleasure matters.”

7. Notice, too, if shame arises or thoughts telling you that you don’t deserve pleasure, it’s not okay to feel good, etc. Allow these thoughts and feelings to be here - it’s okay! They’re important information. See if you can breathe into them, honor them, and return to your journey through the senses.

8. Take as much time as you need. Remember that experiencing pleasure is your birthright.

9. When you’re ready, close this ritual by placing your hands somewhere on your body and speaking some loving words to yourself, to your body, to whichever parts of you need it.

Ritual to Open to More Pleasure

This ritual is intended to support you in feeling in your body where you hold blocks to pleasure - and moving them out in a fun way. 

In my opinion, it’s not only our tears and pain that move energy and blockages. We can open to more pleasure, and we can move blocks out of our bodies in a fun and playful way as well. In this way, we become open to experiencing more pleasure and create a new pattern in the body. 

For this ritual, feel free to put on some music and create a sacred space, whatever that means to you - (maybe lighting candles or incense, or not - you are a sacred space so you don't have to do anything but you can if you'd like!).

You’ll want to be somewhere you can be comfortable, like in your bed or on a yoga mat.

1. Once you're set up and comfortable, start to feel in your body where you hold blocks to pleasure. I recommend starting by sitting in meditation and breathing deep, feeling these places that are present today (and if you can’t feel anything, that’s okay too).

2. When you feel ready, start to move those blocks in a fun and intuitive way. Just play - see if you can let the moving of these blocks itself be fun and pleasurable.

3. You can use laughter, orgasm, shaking, yelling, roaring, moaning, hissing, vibrating, circling, dancing, moving, or anything else you can feel into or think of to move these blocks out of your body.

4. Can you let it be pleasurable? Can you let it be fun even to heal and explore and transmute? Let your creativity and intuition take over when it comes to moving these crunchy, sticky places out of your body.

5. When you feel complete, take a moment to breathe and notice your new state. Can you feel where there is more space, more openness, in your body? How does your connection to yourself feel now? Breathe, notice, and perhaps take a few moments to explore these questions and process your experience in your journal.

Looking for more pleasure-based rituals? Check out this blog post for more rituals for Beltane!

Your spell's over, now what? 3 Ways to release or repurpose your ritual items

You waited for the perfect moon phase, gathered your supplies, and sent your magic out into the world. Now, you’re left with the remnants of your magical workings. What can be done with your leftover jars and bowls of notes, rocks, herbs, and candle wax?

Whether your magical workings have come to fruition or not, you have quite a few options when it comes to releasing or reusing your past spells. In this blog post, I’m going to share three different ways to honor and release your sacred spells and objects. 

It is the very act of your spell and ritual work that releases your desires out into the universe. The remnants left behind can serve as helpful reminders, but repurposing or releasing your spell will not break or reverse anything. There are certainly some practices that may require you to keep the components of your spell intact, however, if that’s the case, you’ll undoubtedly know. Trust your inner guidance system. 

As you read through these options, know that you can use one or all of these methods to repurpose or release your spell objects. Some objects may not work for certain methods outlined below, in that case, it’s okay to combine. You can also check out this quick video I created for our Instagram page. 

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A post shared by Cassie Uhl (@cassieuhl)

1. Burning Ceremony

Fire is a transformative tool, so this method goes beyond simply making space for new spells. If your spell has ended it may be time to let it transform in new ways. This method can also be helpful to aid you in detaching from the outcome of your spellwork. Fire is powerful!

A burning ceremony is a great option for spells that include paper, herbs, candle wax, and other burnable objects. Most candle wax is paraffin, which means it’s not ideal for burying in the ground, and reusing it can be time-consuming. If your spell has leftover wax, burning it is one of the easiest and safest ways to release it. 

For this method, you’ll need a large cauldron, fireproof dish, or outdoor fire. Depending on what the contents of your spell were, you’ll likely want to do this outside to prevent a huge plume of smoke from inhabiting your house. As you release your items into the fire, trust that the energy will continue to transform and benefit yourself and others. 

2. Release to the Earth

A gentler option is to release your items back into the Earth. For this method, it’s imperative that you only release items that are natural and biodegradable. For example, most candles are made from paraffin wax and are not suitable for this method. I also do not recommend burying glass jars or bottles. Herbs, plants, biodegradable papers, and crystals are ideal for this method. If your spell was contained in a jar or vessel of some kind, I recommend reusing it, see the next section for tips on this. 

Items that should not be given back to the Earth:

• Salt: salt can harm or even kill plants

• Candle wax: most candles are made with paraffin wax which is not biodegradable

• Anything that is not 100% biodegradable

You can bury your items in a meaningful location or in your backyard, the location itself doesn’t need to be special. If you live near a natural body of water, releasing them into the water is a great option as well. This method can be transformative like the fire but in a gentler way. I find this method is great for inspiring a sense of gratitude and giving thanks to Mother Earth.

3. Cleanse and reuse

For all the objects you want to reuse like meaningful crystals and items that don’t burn or biodegrade, you’ll want to energetically cleanse them. Because spell and ritual work evokes such strong emotions, it’s important to energetically cleanse items before reusing them for another purpose. Unless, of course, the energy you imbued your items with is something you want to keep around. However, if you performed a spell for letting go of a past relationship, and then want to use the same jar or tools for helping you gain a new career, it’ll be best to cleanse your items.

There are a variety of ways to cleanse physical objects. Here are a few simple techniques. 

• Place your items in salt overnight.

• Hold your items in cleansing smoke like rosemary, cedar, lavender, or some other herb in line with your spiritual heritage. 

• For rocks or other items that are waterproof, hold them in running water.

• Hold your items in your hands and call on any guides, spirits, or energies you work with to cleanse your items. 

No need to let your sacred space fill up with spellwork from the past! I hope you enjoyed these tips to keep your spell and ritual practice open and flowing.

Inspired Growth Candle Ritual for Imbolc

The Celtic Sabbat of Imbolc honors the midway point between the Winter Solstice and Spring. The Earth is starting to wake up, and even though it may be quite cold still, you can start to see glimmers of nature waking up. On a personal level, this is a season to allow inspiration to stir within you. Imbolc is a call to allow your inner transformations so you can grow into the highest and best version of yourself. Danu Forest says it best here.

"To call in inspiration is to begin to see our life infused with spirit, to discover a new or renewed vision for greater creativity on all levels. To call in healing is to resolve the things that hold us back or limit our potential. We all have parts of our lives and bodies that need healing, and to give this aspect of ourselves a boost at this time of the year sets us up for a more empowered and happier future." - Danu Forest from The Magical Year

The Goddess Brigid is closely associated with this sabbat. Brigid brings light, inspiration, and healing and aids in childbearing. It’s her whispers which begin to rouse both you and Mother Nature during this time of new beginnings. Brigid connects deeply with the fire element and is often referred to as the “Flame of Ireland.” For these reasons, candle work is especially fitting for Imbolc. Learn more about Brigid here and more about candle magick here.

For this Imbolc ritual, you’ll be calling on the Goddess Brigid to stir inspiration within you. The ideal time to practice this ritual is on the evening of February 1st or anytime on February 2nd. Brigid is associated with the color white, so a white candle will be best for this ritual. As with all ritual work, use what you have. Your intention is the most powerful part of any ritual or spell. If you don’t have one of these items, leave it out, it will still work. 

Inspired Growth Candle Ritual for Imbolc

For this ritual, you’ll need:

• A white candle 

• Rosemary for cleansing (optional)

• Bay leaf for success (optional)

• A sharp tool to inscribe your candle with

• Anointing oil for your candle (whatever you have on hand works, such as almond oil or even olive oil. For an extra layer of energy, try rosemary oil, chamomile oil, or basil oil.)

• Safe space to burn your candle

• Dedicated time to connect with your candle

1. Prepare all of your items and take a moment to center yourself. 

2. Using your carving tool, write “inspire me” on your white candle. As you carve your candle, visualize yourself opening up to receiving insight and wisdom. 

3. Rub your anointing oil over your candle and continue to visualize yourself opening up to receive inspiration from spirit. 

4. Roll your candle in any herbs you’re using, or sprinkle them on top.  

5. Place your candle in a fire-safe dish or holder and light your candle. 

6. When you light your candle, call on the Goddess Brigid to join you, inspire you, and heal you. You might say something like, “Goddess Brigid, I welcome your light into this space. I am open to your inspiration and healing. So it is.”

7. Stay with your candle as it burns. Take 2-5 minutes to sit with your candle and softly gaze at the flame. 

8. As the candle continues to burn, you can continue to meditate and connect with Brigid, you can write down any ideas that come to your mind, or you can simply rest and enjoy the healing light of Brigid. 

9. When the candle is done burning, take a moment to thank Brigid for joining you and thank yourself for taking the time to connect with the season. 

Just like nature grows without force, so will you. Trust that the stirrings of inspiration that you received are exactly what you need to grow into the highest and best version of yourself. Imbolc blessings, dear one!

Learn more about Imbolc and how to connect with this season here.